Fierce Conversations

I recently read the book Fierce Conversations: Achieving Success at Work & in Life, One Conversation at a Time by Susan Scott. Fierce means robus, intense, strong, powerful passionate, eager, unbridled. I was struck by the title, and then the book was assigned in my coaching class.

I particularly liked the author's suggestion on how to confront difficult issues--you know, the conversations that we avoid. Here are here suggestions.

1. Name the issue.


2. Select a specific example that illustrates the behavior or situation you want to change.


3. Describe your emtions about this issue.


4. Clarify what is a stake.


5. Identify your contribution to this problem.


6. Indicate your wish to resolve the issue.


7. Invite your partner to respond.

Scott counsels against other approaches such as asking someone, "How's it going" when there is a clear other agenda.

This is a direct approach, something I sometimes avoid. I prefer to persuade, bring along, educate, and the like. But sometimes confrontation or directness is necessary, and there are conversations that we ought not avoid. Often, everyone is relieved when such issues are brought out in the open in an honest, up front way. For instance, a struggling employee often knows when he or she is struggling or misplaced, and is relieved to be able to talk about.

Scott's book is a quick read and decently interesting. But I think that this is the best part of the book.

What do you think of the author's advice on fierce conversations?